by frog
Noelle McCarthy at the NZ Herald reports:
We’re on the way out. The world is going to end on May 21, according to a man called Harold Camping. Harold runs Family Radio in Oakland California. He has predicted the end of the world by doing maths with the Bible. Having crunched the numbers in the Book of Genesis, he’s fairly certain tomorrow will be the day when it all kicks off.
Perhaps that’s also how Bill English got his GDP per capita growth predictions that supposedly see the Government accounts in a healthy surplus by 2014-15.
BTW, anyone going to a rapture party tomorrow night?
Published in Economy, Work, & Welfare | Society & Culture by frog on Fri, May 20th, 2011
Tags: Bill English, Budget 2011, harold Camping, rapture
on the trolls and those who are unable to keep on topic
Idiot/Savant at No Right Turn has done some analysis that shows things pointing in the opposite direction to English’s predictions.
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http://whoar.co.nz/2011/may-21-2011-a-portrait-of-true-believers-in-the-end-of-the-world/
“…Circled dates dot a calendar on John Ramsey’s refrigerator door. They show the busy life of a 25-year-old: dinner parties, birthdays, holidays. But only until May 21.
Every month after May has been crossed out. As has all of 2012.
Ramsey is one of thousands of followers of a loose-knit Christian fringe movement whose members are increasingly found on sidewalks, in parks and at transit hubs in major cities throughout the United States.
They recite passages of the Bible line-by-line and say they have decoded a message for humanity: The world is about to end.
“God says when you see the sword come upon the land, you blow the trumpet and you warn the people,” says Ramsey, paraphrasing Ezekiel 33:3. “All I’m doing is telling what I know.”
Ramsey and the movement’s followers say that at 6 p.m. on Saturday, May 21, the ground will quake, graves will open and many of the dead will ascend to heaven. Two hundred million of the ‘saved’ — dead or alive — will float up. Those left behind will be doomed to live among blood, destruction and disease for five months before God annihilates the Earth on Oct. 21.
These warnings are drawn from the obscure and complex Biblical numerology of Harold Camping, an 89-year-old televangelist who owns Family Radio, a vast international network of Christian radio stations.
Camping has been predicting ‘The End’ for the past two years. A similar prediction went unrealized in the mid-1990s…”(cont..)
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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Maybe the rapture has arrived early. Daylight saving and leap days and all that mucks up the calendar.
Nobodys commented at Frogblog since yours almost 3 hours ago phil u. Is there still anybody else still out there or is it just you and me whos been spared the assention to the Lord?
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Its still yesterday in Californi-ay
…. and unreason is rampant in the USA.
If we could harness the power of human stupidity we’d have no problems at least until the heat death of the universe…. or maybe longer.
BJ
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It began with William Miller who picked 1843/1844 for the advent (coincidently a period of campaign for the Presidency) – and so of course the usual candidates for the office of POTUS emerged out of the undergrowth of their society. The winner (the one not killed running for office) declared his policy Manifest Destiny – an America united across the continent (this required stealing land off Mexico by using settlers as fronts to legitimise this as the choice of the local people) from sea to shining sea.
Today the PM of the state of Israel is to meet POTUS.
Locally they call it the river to the sea, or sea to the river policy. Settlers are still being used.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-middle-east-13466910
Lest we be too smug, local settlers here, once in control of agency of the Crown power, stole land off Maori.
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a herald on-line poll sez the budget has caused 30% ‘to change their vote’….
does anyone really think they are flocking to national…?
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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Don’t be silly Frog.
The world ends in 2050 when the oil runs out, CO2 hits 1000ppm, the temperature rise by 10deg C and everyone dies of heat prostration.
I know because the Green party says so.
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It’s 21st May and.. I’m still alive!! Our world is not ending on 21st May~ Cheers everyone!
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I’m still here..
I think?
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no..you are one of the damned…those left to suffer..
..haven’t you noticed yet how fewer people there are around…?
..most churchgoers are still here tho’…
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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It’s still the 21st in some parts of the world, including the US.
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imagine the hangover..
..they’ll be gutted…
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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Such a lovely day to suffer the torment of the damned! I try to not enjoy it.
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Can anyone else smell sulphur?
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My beautiful garden! A boiling tar-pit! Damn!
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Has anyone seen Mrs Greenfly?
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Here puss puss puss!
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Hello?
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“..Can anyone else smell sulphur?..”
nah..!..that’s just all the cow/pig-shit/chemical run-off in yr southland rivers/streams/lakes…eh…?
you’ve already got yr ‘boiling tar-pit’…
..a home-made one…
..and all in just 150 yrs…eh..?
haven’t we done well…?
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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That could be it Phil – that’s a relief!
Doesn’t explain Mrs G’s whereabouts though.
Nor the cat’s.
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there are so few without sin..
..maybe she was one of them..?
..(she could be arguing yr case..eh..?..before the big fella..)
..and of course cats go..but they go below…
..(it sez so in the dog-bible…eh..?..
..they call it the yapture..)
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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Ha! ‘Arguing my case’! Don’t know about the ‘my case’ bit.
Oh, and I forgot to offer my commiserations to you Phil,for still being here, you know, on terra firma. I’d have thought vegans were a shoo-in.
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Oh and anyone hear about Bill, subject of the post?
Was it rapture or rupture for the double-dipper from Dipton. Perhaps he had it both ways.
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bill..?
he’s sitting at the right hand of satan..
(hooded-eyes and all..can’t ya see him…?
..key is the court-jester…
and i think you have to believe..to get a ticket on the rapture-bus..
..alas…
..and yes…vegans are ahead of the pack..by quite a bit…
..but ‘shoo-in’ might be a bit strong/assuming…..
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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espiner asked english if he remembered how many jobs he promised in his 2010 budget..
..english didn’t..
..espiner reminded him that it was 170,000…
..(oops..!..)
at least english had the decency to blush…
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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This Government is blind to the fat that exists in our economy and continues to target the leanest sections.
http://localbodies-bsprout.blogspot.com/2011/05/revenue-and-debt.html
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labour appear to be considering a capital gains tax…(we are one of the few countries that dosen’t have one..)
a land tax..(that’ll get the land-bankers/squatters..)
..and a financial transaction tax..(recommended/being argued by the european union..as a brilliant example of a low-pain/big-gain tax…
..that’ll get them a way down the road..
..and present a clear alternative to national..
..frankly..they are mad if they don’t have all three..
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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(ahem..!..)..as are the greens…
..mad if they don’t have all three…
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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Oh, and I forgot to offer my commiserations to you Phil,for still being here, you know, on terra firma. I’d have thought vegans were a shoo-in.
phil has to do a few eons in limbo for bad blog behaviour first
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you mean that unfortunate (polyester-clad) breast-press business..?
..and bless them..!..i say…those polyester clad breasts..
..the world would be a lesser place without them…
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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McCarten nails the budget: http://www.nzherald.co.nz/politics/news/article.cfm?c_id=280&objectid=10727202
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The trouble with coded messages in the bible is that we can’t be certain the authors of those messages knew what they were talking about.
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The Rapture has returned ‘The Fly’ to us.
Can’t wait til the Sermon on the Manure….
Guess he loaves and fishes a bit…
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Mikesh; the Bible is the worlds first ‘cut-and-paste’ job imo.
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Anyone seen Moggy?
the double dipton?
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Mrs G is back!
I’m so grateful!
She said she couldn’t stand the sound of timbrels and the smell of unctiousness.
She’s such a good
womanflyette.Like or Dislike:
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Queueing for a ‘double down’ @ KFC last I heard.
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Well, looks like I didn’t make it either, ima stuck here wiff you buggars.
So, what do we do now?
Barbecue?
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You’ll be missing Mrs Barunda Shunda.
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Mikesh; the Bible is the worlds first ‘cut-and-paste’ job imo.
Ha!
Not so sure about that Mark, but interestingly enough, I could write a thesis on ‘cut-n-paste’ Christianity from my experience (escape?) from the Pentecostal church, they are masters at it!!
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You’ll be missing Mrs Barunda Shunda.
Strangely, she is right here beside me!!, I’m trying to figure out what she did!!
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Shunda! It’s not her!!
Move away very quietly.
Then run.
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Yer a few of them are Shunda – having been brought up with the Aramaic language there are many obvious mis-translations there – then there are the missing books – the coptic Bible – the re-writes of various churches…..but where does it predict the return of Greenfly as the son of Man?
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Move toward the Light Shunda! hehee
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As Mark intimates, I was indeed born of a virgin
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aphid
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‘virgin’ is a most unusual word..
..it only has one anagram…
..spooky..!
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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whereas for greenfly…
..i quite like ferny gel…
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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Phil – ‘spooky’ isn’t an anagram of ‘virgin’.
Riving (the splitting of wood in the direction of its long fibres) is though
Ferny gel! I use that on my calloused hands!
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…ah the illuminati!
Da Vinci was an old medieval toss-pot
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“spooky virgin” confesses ARL Star!
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i’ve never actually heard of leonardo da vinci referred to that way b4..
..isn’t that just too off-hand..?
..(is that what the kids are saying..?..)
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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mushies again..mark…?
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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“mushies again..mark…?”
I wish Phil
No….bible study followed by bathing ‘the parts’ in cold water
A humble breakfast of dirrt followed by self-flagellation til noon
The afternoons are hard though!
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“..(is that what the kids are saying..?..)”
No they’re full of conspiracy theories – don’t know what to beliebe – a perfect subject for exploitation.
If Da Vinci was so bright, why’ndt he invent a simple visor to keep the paint from the Sistine Chapel out of his eyes?
Yer….idjut Vince
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Must have just been God’s advance warning to Bill English to stop telling lies then, rather than the Rapture itself. Seems like Camping over-egged it!.
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It’s a sad addiction Toad – Liberal Bleach Enemas at both ends may cure him – otherwise – they mostly confess on the rack!
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Burn the witch!!!!!
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You will be damned-ah!, to the fires-arr-heeeeeelllll-ah!!
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I am very disappointed that the rapture didn’t occure, now we still have all those fundamentalist thickos ramming the bible down our throats.
Except maybe for Camping’s little cult!!!!They may keep quiet for a while!!!!!!!
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@greenfly 8:30 PM
Why don’t you just open your throat and take it, (as former Christian Heritage Party Leader Graham Capill suggested on several occasions to younger members of his flock)? Oops, I guess you are too old for that.
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Toad!! that is a bit yucky dude.
But yes, epic fail for Mr Capill.
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For the record, I would have thought that the return of Jesus to fix the planet would have been pretty good Green policy!!
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the verse betrays great expectations Toad – humanity ended some time ago
All we got left is people
Apart from You my Saintly Ones!
Greenfly has returned – that’ll do me
But he’s not the Messiah
He’s a Very Naughty Boy….
I feel Shunda may be the owner of the new Stable in Bethlehem – (Garage in NZ?)
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Here is the new stable hymn:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ex1qzIggZnA
I love it how no one knows quite what the hell is going on!!
I swear, the Barunda’s will learn to dance like this, me and the kids can already do half of it during the much famed “Friday night crazy time”.
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Saw a van today, with bales of hay stacked where the mattress usually goes. Mrs Gfly thought it might be for the new Christ Child’s manger. It was heading east.
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Off to Shunda’s on a Friday Night then……
‘Oh ye men of Riverton that see thyne women transferring the holy bales.
And the Lord Shunda took this Hay – and made it into ‘uge magic mushrooms….and Phil followed the star…(expurgated by Pope Greg 4th in 600ad)….darnit
Unto you has come the whisky…..’ anon.
I see they’ve Legalized ALL substances in Portugal – leading to a down taking of said substances…..(along with all the alarming absence of crime etc)
Another Dragon is slain, more people freed – but not here Dipton, not tonight…
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Ah well…party’s over I guess – the Italian Police are going Bang Bang Bang again – don’t know why – Jesus never wore Jackboots and a Black Uniform – uninform.
We hand the Baton on and weep for opportunities wasted…..Epsom, where art thou???
Running a Green are we?
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predictives be lot now.
But I think they say the world’s end news to be known in world.
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Well the world did not end and now I’ve gotta pay my energy bill for this month. What a bummer.
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All hail Princess Beatrice. Thou hast shielded us lowly scum from the wrath of, of.. er of.. Heck I don’t know.
May your fascinator um, well, fascinate.
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Reports that Minnesota Congresswoman, presidential hopeful and Tea Party activist Michelle Bachmann had been swept up in the Rapture later turned out to be false rumors spread by Ms. Bachmann’s presidential campaign staff, in an attempt to boost her poll numbers for 2012.
Rumors that devout Christian Mike Huckabee had been swept up also turned out to be false when he was later reported seen at a McDonald’s drive-thru in Jonesboro, AK, ordering a double cheeseburger and super-sized fries.
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I want a hat like Princess Beatrice’s Daddy, and I want it now!
*stamps foot
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Pippa’s fascinator…..Hmmmm!
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All is well today in Oakland CA. Long lines at the Cluck-’N-Chuck.
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This is one of the craziest threads for ages!
Has anyone researched ‘partial rapture’? perhaps that’s what has happened, like a slow internet upload or something.
Anyone felt any dual personalities leaving?
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no…’bad phil’ is still here…
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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I experienced a partial rupture yesterday, of my shopping bag and when it happened, I said “Oh, My God!” but I can tell you, I’m a’geddin pretty tired of these lame ‘end of the world’ puns!
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Fyi God-fans. This new church (The Church of St Estuarine the Brackish) in the Riviera of the South opens it’s doors for the first time this coming Sunday (or sunny day, whichever comes first) and offers solace to all those left behind after the Partial Rapture. The church was provided free, by the local Council and has a copper-sheathed spire, pews for scores of faithful and baptism facilities immediately nearby. It’s expected that hordes will turn out for the first service, as an ascension has been (somewhat foolishly, in my opinion) promised. Local ‘low hanging Green fruit’ will be keeping their heads down, but I will be there in full ceremonial costume.
All welcome.
http://robertguyton.blogspot.com/2011/05/church-of-st-estuarine-brackish-at.html
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of course..i ‘rapture’ most days…
..i’m rapturing as we speak…
(it goes well with a cup o’ tea…)
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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Greenfly, will there be ministry time? I have some devils that need excising!!
Are you skilled in such matters?
I have visited this church before!! and have pictures! but I must say, the architecture style has me puzzled, what is it? seems to have more than a hint of the tanalith cellulose style…..
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how will taxing yr devils help..?
phil(whoar.co.nz)
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whoops!!
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They will move to Australia
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I hereby excuse all those Devils thine Shunda – we are still coming over friday. There will be misery time and a bit of river baptising (if St Eustarine the Brackish is out on bail and back in men’s clothing)
What have those Pentecoastals done to you St Shunda???
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@Shunda barunda 2:39 PM
Ah, Tasmanian devils then?
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Ah Shunda – the H5 is but the Body of the Church. It’s been blessed and expunged, rendered free of taint and wholly given over to our use – bless the dear hearts of our Local Bored. There will be Baptism and there will be Wake. I’ll Officiate, til challenged, then it’s Anyone’s turn.
Pentecoastals! That’s very good Mark! I’ve carved your name on a pew Front and Centre, but expect you’ll want to preach the Gospel according to Yorn.
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…..and in those times there Was No Footy, nor TV to watch it on, and a great thirst arose among the Throng
– except for St.Phil U who took up his Magic Carpet Cleaner and tossed up on the Flockarti no more…….and let us not forget O Lord that Chapel of the Convicts bowled underarm, whence the Skies turned black, and a great rumbling was heard among the vitals, and he himself cried out
“Oi! Couldn’t find another Theif O great one?”
Whence on the third day he was exfiltrated to a secure location and rendered the bruised truth of all things….
And all the People of Epsom turned salty…..and thus was St.Shunda’s Holy Fridge cleaned right out for all to see….and “The Fly” returned to Jerusalem at last, riding on his Ass…..(ad infinitum)
Gee Ta Greenfly – I’ll not forsake thee!
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Ha ha! Mark!
I could tell you guys a few stories….
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Well they tried to cast my personality out for a start:
thou shalt NOT think independently!
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The National Party does that too Shunda!
I wonder…???
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aren’t they the ‘Exclusive Brethren?’ – Hollow Legs.
The name itself is a bit greedy – it suggests that people are queuing to join – not this little black Duck!
What DID they DO Shunda?! I’ll tell you about me and the Witnesses – ha, and in their own special Patronising manner they thought they had found the Ignoratii….I’ll tell on my ex-church if you tell on them Penteys
OOooo there’s a link here Flybaby!
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There was once a quaker in my boots.
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Look down with mercy Lordie – thy Fly was undone!
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@Shunda barunda May 23, 1:10 PM
Seems this guy had a ‘partial rapture’:
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Ouch!! a brass nipple in the bum!
Well you learn something new every day, trucks have nipples!!!
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Anyone else thinking about god ending the world in a week or two just so he can laugh at this?
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